Kids (Yet Again)

Original post date: November 19, 2012

Sorry I haven't written lately. The weddings have been nice, but not noteworthy until this week. The hall is closed next Friday, so perhaps many couples decided to take the plunge a week early. I did 10 ceremonies Friday morning, and the groups ranged from two (just the couple) to a full house. The cutest wedding featured the bride, groom, and their infant daughter, who was strapped to Mommy's chest. The little girl had just learned to blow raspberries, so the ceremony was punctuated with slobbery lips. When she would get a little fussy, Mom would rock back and forth a little. I found myself doing likewise a couple times, and it always worked. I'll try that again next time we have a fussy 5-year-old.

I always advise a couple to make a child part of the ceremony if they like, or if there could be squirming and crying. In one of the other ceremonies, a toddler became part of the wedding, and "helped" when the rings were exchanged by grabbing Daddy's ring and hurling it to the ground. Luckily, Daddy picked it up and put it on Mommy's finger,and there you go - married!

Fashion report
Two notable dresses this week: an old-fashioned wedding dress - long-sleeved with lace decolletage - very lovely, and a traditional Korean wedding dress like this: http://www.newbridal.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/korean-wedding-dress-6.jpg - that looked kind of uncomfortable.

Best groom
The well-dressed nerd - cardigan, bow tie, and horn-rimmed glasses, a la Pharrell Williams or Russell Westbrook.

My Name In Ink

Original post date: October 5, 2012

It only took me 4 years at the Hall of Records to get tired of printing my name, which I do 2 times for most ceremonies.  I decided that a stamp would be much more legible, if not easier.  (This is for my spelled name, not signed name.  That is still unreadable.)  My lovely wife Sue got me the stamp and wouldn't you know it, the next week at the Hall of Records was rather slow.  I only used my stamp about 5 times, and one of the clerks had to reprint a license because I stamped a little off-center. Practice will make perfect, I'm sure.

The main problem with being able to perform Spanish ceremonies will be familiar to anyone who knows a bit of a different language.  The people for whom I perform the ceremony assume I understand Spanish.  I can get the gist of most conversations, but not at the speed at which most people speak their native language.  I need to learn more and better Spanish.

Photo sharing as a way of saving effort and space is obviously not catching on.  The group at one ceremony had 9 different cameras & phones going at once, with some people working 2 in tandem. There's no squashing the feeling that someone else's pictures won't be the ones we would've taken.

Fashion report
Cutest rings: matching Scrabble tiles with the mate's initial - hers had his first initial, his had hers. Both were worth 1 point - nice and equal.

A few lovely asymmetrical, flowing dresses, one beaded with a beaded headband, like an understated tiara.

So much ink, including a bride with a breastplate tattoo of a winged heart.  Still not tempted to get one myself.  She wore a lovely black dress, but kept a denim jacket over it.

FIRE!

Original post date: September 4, 2012

The big story at the marriage factory Friday morning wasn't weddings - it was fire.  A fight between two of the people who sleep in the Hall of Records entryway turned nasty, and someone set fire to the front of the building.  The recording department had to move into the area where I sit.  Normally, that space is almost empty, with all the clerks out front, helping customers.  This week, folks I'd never met with piles of papers were at every desk.  It felt claustrophobic.  Surprising how habituated one gets to an environment.

There was a wedding waiting as soon as I arrived.  The bride & groom wore flip-flops & shorts and chewed gum.  Luckily, the day got better from there.

I did more Spanish than English weddings, including a multi-lingual ceremony where the mother of the bride spoke no English and the groom spoke no Spanish.  Everyone was happy at the end.  Four of the eleven brides Friday morning had the same name. I don't think that's happened before.

Fashion report

• A pair of blond twin boys in matching corduroy coats - adorable!
• Matching rhinestone shoes (looking ever so slightly like this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Hirst-Love-Of-God.jpg) and fingernails
• A cute dress & leggings that looked like they'd been dyed with potato-print
• A matching white dress and feathery hair comb

The funniest part of the morning was when I asked a couple if they would be exchanging rings.  She said, "No", and he said "Yes".  She gaped at him as he sheepishly pulled two ring boxes out of his vest pockets.  Surprise!  She was thrilled.

Lessons Learned Pt. 2

Original post date:  July 23, 2012

1. Don't be afraid to ask how names are pronounced.  Gone are the days of Steve and Cindy.  Welcome, Abraxia, Shevvonne, and Reandeal.

2. Ask everyone to silence cell phones.  This prevents the interruption as Dad calls to congratulate the couple and "I like big butts" rings out across the wedding room.

3. Have any photographers take a couple test shots, so the happy couple will be in focus, and you'll be ready for any interesting camera noises.

4. Wedding rings can cause a lot of confusion.  3 simple rules:

• Get the rings ready before the ceremony begins.  Finding them at the bottom of a purse really puts a crimp in the proceedings.
• The groom's left hand is opposite the bride's right hand.  This is surprisingly challenging to remember.
• Rings often don't fit, especially when you're nervous.  It happens a lot and means nothing - don't worry about it.

5. Wash your hands after every couple ceremonies, or if anyone coughs or sneezes.  I don't know how the clerks avoid being sick all the time.

From Miss Janet:
I would add to number 4:

• Rings hit the floor, no big deal.  Someone picks them up and we finish the ceremony.
• I can't tell you how many times I have said, "other left".